Guess the 2015 end-of-year best/worst list – survey responses!

Many people asked me for the opportunity to make my end of year posts a little bit more “interactive”, so at the start of December I made a survey to invite caonimas to guess my picks for the 2015 best and worst lists.  376 readers stepped up to the plate, throwing caution to the wind, fearlessly ticking boxes and filling out free text fields.  This post contains their answers!

Question 1: Hi!  How are you?  Answer in as much or as little detail as applicable.

The usual ratio of happy/sad/frustrated/busy/lazy/trolling people appeared as per every time I do a survey and ask this question.  Some standout replies:

I’m dying from boredom from listening to EXO’s new album but I can’t stop because I really like hearing D.O.’s voice. Just your typical, stupid EXO fangirl here, nothing new (I refuse to say EXO-L). Also, I have no idea why I’m doing this survey because my music taste and yours are different but eh.

Don’t worry everyone’s music taste is different!

I am good how are you?

I’m good!

you never use my responses here anyway does it matter you fuckin cuck

Yes I do, and yes it does.  Now stop whining about how I don’t use your response and show higher determination levels to write a better response.

I am ok. Instead of doing something I should have done for the last month I am doing this to get into the mindset of doing stuff. If it works, thanks.

Hope that works out for you.  Although if you’re reading this instead of doing that thing, then it probably hasn’t, hey.

Doing good, getting in better shape to be prepared to start my conscription (basic training) in the Danish Armed Forces.

Good luck out there, don’t get killed!

My mom is finally divorcing my extremely abusive worthless piece of shit “father” who has abused me in literally every single way, sexually included, so I’m in a pretty good mood but I’m also scared because he might go nuts and abuse us even more or abuse or kill one of our cats. TL;DR My stomach hurts and I’m scared but hopeful.

Hopefully this worked out for you and you’re reading this from a safe place.

Hi, Kpopalypse! Frankly I’m only answering this survey to be able to answer this question. I’m currently slogging my way through a revise-and-resubmit where something like 40% of the feedback is “you need to provide page numbers with direct quotes.” I’m not complaining, this is GREAT news to get such easily fixed criticism, I’ve just been procrastinating on it all to hell and back. also staying off Twitter because I really cannot contribute anything to gun-control arguments.

Don’t argue with people on the Internet who are anti-gun control.  Remember – they have guns!

Jaehyo put out topless pictures a few days ago and I’m still reeling. Plus, the best sageuk character since Lady Mishil just got killed off, and my emotions are a complete mess. Gonna need naked SoJiSub tomorrow.

Just documenting it here that people like this do exist, so remember this the next time some annoying person gets all offended about me looking at girls in k-pop groups.

Fantastic! I made a whole bunch of gingerbread cookies for my classmates to celebrate the Christmas spirit, and we’re going to South Korea in the year end so I may or may not be able to sneak into a dorm to steal some underwear. :-) I do hope you’re doing fine as well, and your cat too!!! Please do a post about your cat one day, I’d love to read it!

I’ll consider this feedback carefully.

I’m fine. I am cheating on my boyfriend with a teacher and life couldn’t be better (except I’m a whore). Advice for this situation? Should I continue being a bitch or should I stop? Why is monogamy even a thing??? Why don’t I feel guilty, oppa?

I’m not going to say stop screwing the teacher because maybe he’s worth it but I’d definitely say you should confess to your boyfriend.  Being slutty is fine and totally 100% approved by Kpopalypse as long as you’re being careful (personal safety, contraception etc) but lying about it will complicate your life.  Telling the truth won’t be pleasant but it’s important.  Who knows, maybe you’ll find a guy who isn’t into monogamy either and you can be happy whores together.  They’re out there.

The real question is why do you continuously put yourself through this

For your entertainment!

I am currently doing this at work. I am hoping to be able to fap to all the images and gifs available in this survey. Don’t disappoint me or I will hunt you down and kill you.

Don’t fap at work, fapping is important and demands your full attention without distraction.

Amazing. BTS is making me happier than I’ve ever been in my life ? but at the same time I also feel bad. I’ve basically neglected metal for kpop and it upsets my fiancé. He thinks that he’s lost his metal girl and that makes me feel bad ? He just can’t seem to realize that I’ve always loved pop. I was going through a weird phase when we met where I thought I had to reject everything that I previously loved because it was lame and not metal (I was a stupid 18 year old). I hope you’re doing well.

There’s no reason why you can’t like more than one genre.  I never gave up metal, or anything else… it just stopped being my primary focus.  I think people who only listen to one genre of music are strange.  All genres are inter-related anyway.

I have pneumonia and a sore throat so I’m sore and tired. Do you have any idea of how to ease a sore throat?

Don’t talk so much, rest your voice.

Pretty bored as hell. Camping outside of a store for the release of a pair of Jordans. I’m on my 10th hour now with 6 more to go. Hope I get these shoes. I’m seated on the floor and my butt is numb. Thankfully there’s wifi so i can kill time filling this thing up.

Do people really do this?  Why can’t you just wait a week or two and then buy the shoes, or order them in and get them later?  What’s with this weird consumer culture where people have to be the first in line to get everything?  I’m glad my posts are at least filling your time and hopefully you’re reading this while doing something less pointless.

FINALS CAN SUCK SHINDONGS HAIRY CHUB

Yes final exams suck, sorry my surveys always come out at exam time but it’s hard enough keeping track of my own life let alone exam periods all around the world.

I am Kitty, that one Blackjack (probably the only one left) who you once told to please reproduce. I feel honoured that Kpopalypse thinks I am smart, because Kpopalypse is smart.

Cheers!

Stop starting with the same shit in every of your survey. Get’s so old.

Not as old as incorrect apostrophe use.

fuck off

no u

I was feeling alright until I scrolled down and saw a gif of Eunjung biting the paper, now I feel great. I can’t help but feel a bit disappointed though because I’ll have to go to bed fapless with a boner because I really need to get to sleep ASAP.

He is referring to this GIF, reposted for the later use of all surveydoers who forgot to click “save as” the first time:

I’m tired as fuck and I should be sleeping or doing my thesis but I’m so drained that I don’t give a shit anymore and instead of tallying the survey I conducted for it, I decided to re-watch Jolin Tsai’s MAMA perf and answer your survey instead because they’re much more interesting… I honestly wish a magical Ciaonima will appear and help me do all the work.

Hopefully Raina came through for you and this happened.

You iljin slut caonima. I hope ultra iljin pedophile IU tittyfuck your face.

Me too!

I would say I’m currently in a lot of emotional pain unfortunately. I really hope this doesn’t have a character limit. The truth is I am the person that has been constantly asking you about that girl and although you warned me about her so many times I refused to believe I would get hurt. Now I am hurt and it’s not a pleasant feeling. I feel like dying or going into a coma. It’s my fault obviously, but I’m an idiot, with social awkwardness which is why Fuck there actually is a character limit.

Like Neitzsche says, what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.  So don’t die, just learn the important lessons!  The next time you encounter a situation where you are crushing on someone you will have extra knowledge that will help you.

OPPAR NOTICE ME!!

You are officially noticed.

Why do you make this question always mandatory? I don’t have enough determination to think of something witty. In any case, I’m fine thanks. Hope you’re doing fine too.

There is no pressure to be witty, just be yourself.

Great! I’m really excited to see the results of your lists since I have a strange love for seeing other people’s opinions of songs, specifically kpop songs.

Please enjoy the following answers!

Question 2: What artist and song will be the #1 on Kpopalypse’s favourites list for 2015?

According to readers my choice was a tie – between Stellar’s “Vibrato” and T-ara’s “So Crazy”.

Both of these did end up in my top 30 – but not at #1!

Here’s the full list of what you picked:

Overall I was impressed with the picks, on average people did well trying to guess my taste (ignoring CL which I’m pretty sure were troll picks).  Keep in mind that for this question and all others, I couldn’t use responses that listed more than one song (“everything by BigBang” etc), or that were ambiguous about the song chosen (i.e “that song Ailee put out” when she put out two different songs, etc), fortunately most people read the questions correctly!

Question 3: What artist and song will be the #1 on Kpopalypse’s worst-of list for 2015?

Nobody got this right, but you were mostly warm.

CL’s half-baked weak clone of MIA’s “Bad Girls” really cleaned up here, and several readers desperately hoped that after two second-placings in a row, the Baddest Female win the coveted #1 worst song spot.  However it was not to be!

The answer was of course Keith Ape’s terrifying trap endurance ordeal “It G Ma“, but the most popular picks were almost as scary.

After this question came the following picture:

Question 4: Why is there a picture of Eunjung here?

All of these options were in fact correct, except the last two – I would never try to bias my surveys (unless it’s funny)!

Question 5: This year will also have a “most disappointing comeback” entry. What artist and song will it be?

I’m completely impressed by the 49 surveydoers who guessed “4 Walls” correctly!

Of course I hadn’t exactly kept my disappointment in f(x)’s cover of SHINee’s “View” a secret, and okay maybe it wasn’t really a cover but the songs are so sonically close together that it might as well have been.  “4 Walls” certainly wasn’t absolutely awful, but after such a great track record from f(x) in the past it sure was a letdown.  To rub salt into the wound, “View” was actually a far better song.

Question 6: This year will also have a “great song kept off the favourites list because of [mystery reason x]” entry. What artist and song will it be, and what is the mystery reason keeping it off the favourites list?

This was a hard question, and only one of you anonymous surveydoers got both parts of this question right:

Oh My Girl – Closer (great song, ruined by vocal wank at the end)

Whoever you are, consider yourself among the caonima elite!

The song starts gradually introducing the Autotuned vocal warbles at 2:15, for those who were confused about my write-up.

Question 7: What song that you absolutely love and adore will Kpopalypse take a big fat shit on?

This question was optional, but 262 people decided to fill it out anyway.  Here are the results from those who nominated just ONE track, I guess f(x) fans were feeling a little self-conscious about the low quality of “4 walls”:

Question 8: What completely shit song will be riding high on the favourites list just to annoy you?

226 extremely brave caonimas dared to answer this optional question, knowing full well that the knowledge could be used against them.  Although how you people thought I would actually like BigBang’s comically awful “Bang Bang Bang” and put it on my favourites list is beyond me.

Here’s the full list!

Question 9: How butthurt are you that Kpopalypse is doing a poll about what you think HE likes and dislikes rather than him asking you about what YOU like and dislike?

I always like to track butthurt levels.  In this case they were pretty low.

Question 10: If you would like to have a guess at some of the other entries that will be in the 2015 Kpopalypse lists, please do so in the box below. There are 29 other favourites to guess, 29 other worst-of entries, plus 16 honourable and 16 dishonourable mentions, feel free to guess as many or as few as you choose. You could also write something else in this box if you wanted, like how much you enjoy surveys, or how you like free text questions because of the beautiful freedom of expression that they allow. You could even leave this question blank if you prefer to be mysterious and enigmatic.

Here’s a collection of the most mysterious and enigmatic responses:

I’m mysterious and enigmatic.

mysterious and enigmatic MY ASS, you gave me a text box and I plan to use it. I will express the hope that Girls’ Day’s “Ring My Bell” gets a special dishonorable mention for (a) being a mess (b) having an even messier video (c) exposing the group to ridiculous netizen bullshit. I thought Hyuna’s “Roll Deep” was pretty meh but maybe it’ll make your honorable mention list. anyway, I enjoy your work and that’s why on occasion I message you awkwardly on Twitter (when I’m on Twitter). I will confess to hoping you liked my 4Minute writing, if you saw it beyond the one mention (oneweekoneband.tumblr.com/tagged/4minute/chrono, if you didn’t). That week turned out to demand more of me than I expected. I’m still working on developing a personal style worth a damn, which is not going to be to everyone’s taste (and of the people to whose taste it might be, half of them won’t see it, of those who do most won’t care, some will pretend not to care, et cetera). But I have not yet gotten to the point where I can be indifferent (or convincingly fake indifference) to other people’s reception of my work. hence the self-promotion. anyway! I have now added all the required page numbers and have to do more substantial changes now, so I will sign off. I hope you’re doing okay and not broiling too much.

I’ll go with mysterious and enigmatic, thanks.

I prefer to be mysterious and enigmatic but I wanted to state this fact so I didn’t leave this question blank.

Ye, misterious

I’ll be mysterious and enigmatic then

I’m a mysterious ho bitch. But pease include dear Santa TTS in your worst of. That shit gave me aids but I’m pretty sure Tiffany is what ultimately offed me. I’ll be waiting in hell for her arrival to repent for all the wrong she has done all of us with her voice.

I write this here just because I don’t want to be mysterious and enigmatic, but I have nothing to add either. Fair enough?

I am mysterious and enigmatic.

I prefer to be mysterious and enigmatic.

i’m mysterious and enigmatic.

I prefer to be mysterious and enigmatic.
If you leave this poll open for a month, you’ll get enough shit to read anyways.

I prefer to be mysterious and enigmatic. Pretty sure there will be boy band songs too, but I don’t fap to them so I don’t listen to them either. [list of picks edited out – mostly correct!]

Lazy, not enigmatic or mysterious… ;)

I prefer to be mysterious and enigmatic so I will leave this box blank.

I’d rather prefer to be mysterious and enigmatic. No, wait. That doesn’t work that way. Does it? Just lazy to guess your fucking taste in music. Just do whatever so we can be angry and, at the same time, feeling well for having coincidental opinions about a song with a pretentious and random man on the other side of the planet.

i prefer to be mysterious and enigmatic

A couple other things that came through on various questions:

can i just say that supposed ‘summer girl group battle’? underwhelming like swiss cheese.

Agreed!

Y’know that ringing in your ears? That ‘eeeeeeeeee’? That’s the sound of the ear cells dying, like their swan song. Once it’s gone you’ll never hear that frequency again. Enjoy it while it lasts.

I can’t remember which film this quote is from, but the above quote is a myth.  Yes, the ringing in your ears after going to a loud concert does indicate hearing damage, however the sudden ringing that your ears do spontaneously when there’s no obvious loud noise around is actually your ear’s way of calibrating itself and is perfectly healthy and normal.

Anyway, that’s it for this post!  Maybe I’ll do this shit again next year, what say you?  Did you enjoy the experience of filling out this crap?  Comment below – or leave a mysterious and enigmatic Internet-silence!  Kpopalypse will return soon!