It’s time for Kpopalypse roundup – let’s check out this week’s new releases!
I.O.I (well, most of them)
This week’s radio show was the 2016 Radiothon fundraising edition. I didn’t play any new releases this week, instead I played tracks from the CDs that I gave away on-air to entice listeners to subscribe to the radio station. A list of the tracks actually played is at the playlist post. In the meantime, here’s all the new stuff!
EXO – Lotto
“Wah wah wah Autotune”, I thought any k-pop fan anywhere would be well and truly used to Autotune by now. Don’t kid yourself – the song is the problem, not the effects on the vocals.
Yuri & Seohyun – Secret
The best iteration of the “4 walls” style monotonous electrofart sound yet but that doesn’t mean it’s actually good.
CL – Lifted
Please, nobody tell CL or her fans what “shorty” actually means. It’s funnier if they don’t know. Look at Method Man’s grin, he’s loving this and he’s not going to tell anyone either.
I.B.I – Molae Molae
Apink by numbers, basically.
Hyuna – Morning Glory
Remember folks: the photocards in 4Minute albums are so you can have a souvenir and feel extra-special thoughts for your favourite member! You can keep them, sell them, or trade them with your friends!
Hanhae – Eyescream
I scream, you scream, we all scream for better songwriting in k-pop.
WJSN (Cosmic Girls) – Secret
Meh. Sorry to all those who waited a week with baited breath to find out what I thought about this, that’s all I got.
Badkiz – Hothae
They didn’t pitch-correct or even synthesise the saxophone loops. It really makes the sax stick out actually.
Tymee – Cinderella
And here’s exactly the same thing but more boring. I get that she’s over the whole “pick-up-chu” thing but Tymee lowering her voice to suit her new “tough” persona or whatever just sounds fucking weird.
Romeo – Treasure
Their song’s a bit messy and all over the place, but I like their truck that folds out into a stage.
Agust D – Give It To Me
They’re not even trying to make proper beats anymore.
Agust D – Agust D
This one’s slightly better but damn the ancient art of beat creation is getting lost a little more every day, isn’t it.
J-Min – Ready For Your Love
Someone asked me to review this because I missed it last week, but sorry to disappoint because it’s so boring I have even less to say about it than the new WJSN song.
Bambino – Moonlight Shower
Hey that nutter who posts about Bambino on Anti Kpop-Fangirl constantly was right, this is the new revolution in k-pop sound and style that we’ve all been waiting for. Okay, not really, but it’s actually not a steaming great pile of dogshit like “Oppa Oppa” was so it’s already in the top 10% for this week.
Nell – Dream Catcher
Oh look it’s Nell. Hahahaha.
MASC – Strange
Just ordinary boy-band stuff.
Sleepy – So What
Oh shit, Sleepy’s seen “Windowlicker“.
Jisun – Heart 2 Heart
Speaking of Sleepy, here’s a boring Korean ballad exactly like every other boring Korean ballad ever.
Nu.D – Ballionaire
How did a Korean think up that song title first? Anyway this is as bad as you think it is.
Jay Park & Kirin – City Breeze
Trust Jay Park to do an early 90s retro song and copy awful p-funk and new jack swing instead of the stuff from back then that was actually good. Proof that he’s musical cancer.
Lady Jane – Just 2 Days
A cool Europop style chorus saves this one from Rhodes shitball land.
That’s it for roundup this week – more next week!
